Weight: 183 lbs
Size: 12
Blood Pressure: 130/87
Feeling:
Pre-Cryo: Great
Post-Cryo: A Little Stressed, But Hanging in There...
There is no picture today, but I am sure you will understand...
I had a doctor's appointment today for a consultation, but after an examination they decided they wanted to do some serious testing and I got to hear the words no woman ever really wants to hear.
Biopsy.
Yuck...I knew this was a possibility, but I wasn't expecting them to do it so fast.
Or today.
I was warned it might be unpleasant. Some minor discomfort. The concern is for "endometrial cancer", basically uterine cancer, so the procedure would involve a few shots of a local anesthetic in a sensitive area and the removal of some tissue samples I was told. I tried to text my husband who was at a lunch meeting, but got no reply. I was on my own.
Good thing I was still feeling so "strong", huh? They asked me to return in about an hour and a half, so I took advantage of the time (and the need to quell my serious anxiety) and drove over to get in my cryotherapy during the break. Fortunately the timing worked out and I was able to squeeze it in.
Pre-Cryo:
Needless to say, I was a bit of a ball of nerves, trying to keep it together and hide it as best I could. I didn't want to overreact or make more of it than it was. What exactly do you say anyway? Freeze me, I'm a little nervous about having tiny pieces of my uterus ripped out in an hour?
Nope. Just put it aside and get on with it.
There was a first-time cryotherapy customer trying out the system when I arrived and I got to help talk her through it. That's always a little fun and I like helping someone else through it. I think that (aside from the blog) I must tell at least 3 people personally about cryotherapy each day and refer them over. I hope they show up.
Post-Cryo:
I think it was a blur, to be honest.
I remember it was cold, of course, but that's about it. I remember making small talk. I vaguely recall the Dr. telling me to enjoy the rest of my day and I think I gave him a funny look which I'm sure he couldn't have understood. It's not like he can read my mind. It's also probably weirdly inappropriate to reply with something like "Gee, I'd like to, but I have to go do this potentially life altering scary medical thing. But, no - you have a great day!" So, I activated my rarely used filter and kept my mouth shut.
Seriously. Who takes a break before a biopsy and runs to fit in a quick freeze?
Just me.
I'm not crazy. I knew I was tense, I knew I was stressed, scared and anxious. I knew I was ready to completely freak out and I knew I had to go and do it alone - which was even scarier...I needed something to calm me down. I was half-tempted to take a valium or something, except the nurse had already told me not to take anything in advance. So...cryotherapy to the rescue. I needed calming and this was my go to place.
And it did help. I needed it today badly. It literally occurred to me at one point while driving that if the cryotherapy office was closed for lunch I might not go back for the biopsy at all...like I would just sort of run and hide and cry like a big chicken. I probably would have gotten a grip...I hope I would have...but it was dicey. I tried really hard to hide it, but I was pretty damn scared.
I left cryotherapy with enough time to make it back and summoned all the courage I had to walk in. I admitted to them I was nervous. Their staff was great and they kept me as comfortable as possible. In the end, it wasn't too bad and I got through it just fine. Nothing hurt like I thought it would, just uncomfortable.
The real hard part is the waiting - and that starts now...
I've never had to wait on anything like this before. It's...surreal.
I'm still pretty damn scared.
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